unDENYably…New Year, New Me?

“A New Year’s resolution is a tradition in which a person resolves to change an undesired trait or behavior.” ~ New Year’s Resolution (Wikipedia)

The ball is getting ready to drop in a little over 24 hours, and I am happy to report that I have not seen the tired “New Year, New Me” post on any of social media platforms.  Now that it is not to say that they are not coming because somewhere, someone is going to drop that line.

new-year-new-me

Maybe it’s the  83% asshole in me (I took a quiz on Facebook and I will share another time), but I just have a real question…

….WHAT THE HELL DOES “NEW YEAR, NEW ME,” MEAN?

I mean last year, it was NEW YEAR, NEW ME. And the year before that, it was NEW YEAR, NEW ME. You follow where I’m going?

Yet, here we are, still looking at the same you. Sure you may have changed your hair color or switched up the dreadful, saggy skinny jeans style, but you are still physically the same person.

And if we are still getting the same updates on your ever-changing relationship status or your baby mama issues then that is the same you and maybe we should totally hit the unfollow or unfriend button. Newsflash… no one cares about how many times your “baby mama” took you for a child support review, despite how many likes you receive.

Oh… my all time favorite, for which I have been guilty too, is the post for which you say “I’m going to stop posting or giving attention to social media” all while posting it as a status on…

….ding

……ding….

……ding

..…social media.

I say this because if each year you resolve to have a NEW YEAR, NEW ME, but you are still doing the same thing as you did before, you are not going to make much growth.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with making resolutions or trying to break away from the “old” you.  Again, by definition, a resolution is a resolve to change an undesired trait or behavior. So perhaps we should focus on the undesired traits or behaviors that we need to change, in order to fully develop into a BETTER version of ourselves.

So instead of seeing a changed hairdo as a new invention of ourselves, let us resolve to be happy with who we are, unconditionally.

Or instead of the degrading “baby mama” or “baby daddy” posts, let us resolve to talk to the other person whom we slept with and made a baby to talk about how WE can parent OUR child together.

Lastly, use social media to follow people who actually have some substantial information to share.  If you enjoy following celebrities and reality stars, that’s great, but please do not allow these individuals to serve as a source for your business or relationship platform (again…another discussion for another day). Instead, follow professionals that provide live discussions or webinars on savings, stocks and bonds, and business development, something that will be fruitful in your personal growth.

Now this is no shade towards anyone who has made these posts or who have planned to make this as a post in the future, but I encourage you to look at this time of year as a way to start thinking about the goals that you can align with your resolutions.  Really take the opportunity to be deliberate in identifying what you hope to accomplish in the coming year.

As a single woman…a single mother…and a professional in the counseling world, I strongly believe in the power of setting goals and making plans to reach these goals. And I am not just talking about putting words on paper or speaking pretentiously into the air. I truly encourage you to set goals that are S.M.A.R.T.:

  • Specific
  • Measurable and meaningful
  • Attainable and achievable
  • Realistic and reasonable
  • Timely and trackable

Following these steps will definitely help you to create a plan to become a BETTER you in the new year. After all, “a goal without a plan is just a wish.” (Antoine de Saint)

To help you, my friends and followers, to develop SMART goals for 2017, I highly encourage you to join me for one of my FREE vision parties next month. At this free event, I will help you to not only develop your vision for the new year, but I will also connect you with some wonderful resources to help you follow through on obtaining these goals.

And, if it is not enough to offer this event FREE, there are two chances for you to connect with me:

Richmond-metro (VA) – January 19, 2017: 6pm-7:30pm

Location: Clover Hill Library, 6701  Deer Run Dr, Midlothian, VA 23112

Hampton-Roads (VA) – January 26, 2017: 6pm-7:30pm

Location: TBD

I hope to see you there, but space is limited. So don’t be that wedding guest that shows up without an RSVP after all meals have been paid and accounted. Reserve your spot today at www.beginningsfamilyenrichment.com/store/p16/VisionParty!

Until next time, Happy New Year!

Published by

Monique

Monique is a beautifully, talented, and successful 30-something single mother of one who lives in Virginia. She has provided family education and counseling for years, and now serves as one of her biggest and favorite clients. From single to dating and dating to single, and even navigating the market as single mother, Monique has been through it all. She finds her passion in being relatable and sharing her experiences with her followers in parenting, womanhood, and dating.

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